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Two Polish guys are walking down the street sharing insights. The smarter of the two sees a dog lying down and licking his balls. The less intelligent of the two says to his friend, "Don't you wish yo.... |
Views : 477 Rating : 2.5 Read More... |
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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a case of beer, any kind except Schlitz. The bartender says "What's wrong with Schlitz, don't you like it?" The man says, "I hate that shit. Last nigh.... |
Views : 372 Rating : 2.5 Read More... |
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The parrot and the plumber |
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A plumber promised old Miss Johnson he would be at her apartment by 11am the next day. When he had not arrived at 11:15 she locked up her apartment and went about her shopping.
The plumber arrived .... |
Views : 388 Rating : 2.5 Read More... |
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A woman goes to her boyfriend's parents' house for dinner. This is to be her first time meeting the family and she is very nervous. They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal.
The woman is begi.... |
Views : 339 Rating : 2.5 Read More... |
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On Monday Fred, an old country farmer, bought a mule from Luke, another old farmer, for $100. Luke promised to deliver the mule the next day.
On Tuesday Luke drove up and said, "Sorry, Fred, but I .... |
Views : 342 Rating : 2.5 Read More... |
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A bear said to a rabbit,"Do you have problems with poop sticking to your fur?" The rabbit said,"No, why?" Then the bear picked up the rabbit and wiped his butt. .... |
Views : 351 Rating : 2.5 Read More... |
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There were two lovers, who were really into spiritualism and reincarnation. They vowed that if either died, the other one remaining would try to contact the partner in the other world exactly 30 days .... |
Views : 343 Rating : 2.5 Read More... |
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A bird was flying south for Winter, but he had left it too late and was frozen solid in a storm.
He dropped down into a pasture of cows. The biggest, fattest cow was doing a crap there, and the bird .... |
Views : 326 Rating : 2.5 Read More... |
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Once there three male dogs who set eyes on a beautiful female poodle. They all rushed over to her. Aware of her charms, she said, "I will go out with the first one of you who can use the words 'liver'.... |
Views : 361 Rating : 2.5 Read More... |
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A man named Fred owned a parrot that hardly ever stoped talking. One day the man was going to have an old friend over so he told the parrot to be quiet or else he would flush him. The parrot kept talk.... |
Views : 328 Rating : 2.5 Read More... |
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Back in the days of the old Wild Wild West lived a guy named Red who used to have a lot of fun. He rode into town like he usually did every Saturday night, and he went into the saloon and got drunk. A.... |
Views : 291 Rating : 2.5 Read More... |
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A city slicker moves to the country and decides he's going to take up farming. He heads to the local co-op and tells the man, "Give me 100 baby chickens." The co-op man complies. A week later the man .... |
Views : 329 Rating : 2.5 Read More... |
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In Mississippi, a guy sees a sign in front of a house:
"Talking Dog for Sale."
He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes into the backyard and sees a bla.... |
Views : 303 Rating : 2.5 Read More... |
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One day a lion was walking around the jungle sad and lonely, when he spotted a monkey up in a tree. He yelled up to the monkey to come down and play, but the monkey was too scared. So the lion asked t.... |
Views : 344 Rating : 2.5 Read More... |
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How To Deal with a Doberman |
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A highly timid little man, Casper Milquetoast, ventured into a biker bar in the Bronx and clearing his throat asked, 'Um, err, which of you gentlemen owns the Doberman tied outside to the parking mete.... |
Views : 415 Rating : 2.5 Read More... |
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A woman was thinking about finding a pet to help keep her company at home. She decided she would like to find a beautiful parrot; it wouldn't be as much work as say a dog, and it would be fun to hear .... |
Views : 424 Rating : 2.5 Read More... |
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A little girl asked her Mom, "Mom, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?" Mom says, "No, because the dog is in heat." "What does that mean?" asked the child. "Go ask your father. I think he .... |
Views : 590 Rating : 5.25 Read More... |
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There was a cat and a rooster wondering by a lake. Both were famished, looking for any food they could find, but to no avail. Later on, the rooster finds himself focusing upon a worm, inching its way .... |
Views : 419 Rating : 2.5 Read More... |
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Every year, Bob goes hunting during bear season. One year, Bob goes hunting, and shoots a small brown bear. Then, the mother of that small brown bear comes up to him and says, " I'll give you two choi.... |
Views : 343 Rating : 2.5 Read More... |
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A grasshopper walks into a bar |
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A grasshopper walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bar tender turns to the grasshopper and says "hey, you know we have a drink named after you?"
The grasshopper responds "why in the heck do y.... |
Views : 392 Rating : 2.5 Read More... |
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