There was a businessman, and he was not feeling well, so he went to see the doctor about it. The doctor says to him, "Well, it must be your diet, what sort of greens do you eat?" The man replies, "....

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Q: Why did the guru refuse Novocaine when he went to his dentist? A: He wanted to transcend dental medication. * * * Doctor: We need to get these people to a hospital! Nurse: What is it? Doc....

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A woman in her 90's is distraught after the death of her warm, caring, faithful husband of seventy years. She can't live without him and decides that the best way to do herself in is to stab herself ....

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Dr. Jones goes to the retirement home for his monthly rounds. He sees Joe and asks him, "Joe, how much is three times three?" Joe responds "59." He goes over to Tom and asks, "Tom, how much is ....

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An attractive young girl, chaperoned by an ugly old crone, entered the doctor's office. "We have come for an examination," said the young girl. "Alright," said the doctor. "Go behind that curtain ....

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A college physics professor was explaining a particularly complicated concept to his class when a pre-med student interrupted him. "Why do we have to learn this stuff?" one young man blurted out. ....

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A woman went to the doctor complaining of terribly bad knee pains. After the diagnostic tests showed nothing, the doctor questioned her, "There must be something you're doing that you haven't told me....

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A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor's office. After his check-up, the doctor called the wife into his office alone. He said, "Your husband is suffering from a very severe disease, combined ....

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The aspiring student psychiatrists from various colleges were attending their first class on emotional extremes. "Just to establish some parameters," said the professor, to the student from the Univer....

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A young man had completed medical school. He went back home to the small town to work with his father. They went out the first day to make house calls. As they went in the first house the father said....

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Q: How do two psychiatrists greet each other? A: You are fine. How am I? Q: How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb? A: Only one, but the light bulb has to WANT to change. ....

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George wasn't too happy with his doctor's recommendation to cure his constant fatigue. "You want me to give up sex completely, Doc?" he cried. "I'm a young guy. I'm in the prime of my life. How do yo....

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A lady went to the doctor and complained that her husband was losing interest in sex. The doctor gave her a pill, but warned her that it is still experimental. He tells her to slip it in her husband'....

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One afternoon, a man went to his doctor and told him that he hasn't been feeling well lately. The doctor examined the man, left the room, and came back with three different bottles of pills. The d....

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Tommy is a young boy, just potty trained. When he goes to the bathroom though, Tommy manages to hit everything but the toilet. So his mom has to go in and clean up after him. After two weeks, she has....

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Jerry was removing some engine valves from a car on the lift when he spotted the famous heart surgeon Dr. Samuel Kaiser, who was standing off to the side, waiting for the service manager. Jerry, w....

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Hello. Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2. If you have multiple personaliti....

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A young girl had been suffering from severe headaches and had tests run by her doctor. The doctor said, "I'm sorry miss, but you have a massive brain tumour." The girl started crying and said to h....

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Three expectant mothers were sitting in the obstetrician's waiting room. Two of the ladies began to chat about their pregnancies, and their due dates and such. One of the women said to the other, ....

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Having lunch one day, a sex therapist said to her friend, "According to a survey we just completed, ninety percent of all people masturbate in the shower. Only ten percent of them sing." "Really?"....

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