A farmer was getting drunk in the local bar when a man came in and asked: "Hey, why on this beautiful day are you sitting here getting drunk?" The farmer shook his head and replied, "Some thin....

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While out Sports Fishing off the Florida coast, a tourist capsized his boat. He could swim, but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft. Spotting an old beachcomber standi....

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One Late Evening, a burglar broke into a house he thought was empty. Tiptoeing through the living room he suddenly froze when he heard a loud voice say: "Jesus is watching you!" Silence returned t....

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For years the old rooster had ruled the farm, but lately things weren't quite right. Fewer chicks were being born and so the farmer decided the bird was past its best and bought a new young strapping ....

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One day, down in the mystical forest, a magical frog was hopping towards a water hole. The forest was so enormous that the frog had never laid eyes on another animal before. But today, by chance a bea....

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A wealthy man and his dog were on Safari when one day the dog starts chasing butterflies and gets lost. Wandering about, the dog notices a leopard sprinting towards him, with the intention of having h....

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A cat died and went to heaven where God said: "You've been a good cat all your life. Is there anything you desire?" The cat replied: "I've lived on a farm and had to sleep on a hard floor all my l....

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There was a fly buzzing around a barn one day when he happened on a pile of fresh cow manure. Due to the fact that it had been hours since his last meal, he flew down and began to eat. He ate and ate ....

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A man walks into a bar with an ostrich behind him. The bartender asks for his order, and the man says, "I'll have a beer," and turns to the ostrich saying, "What's yours?" "I'll have a beer, too,"....

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A Man bought an old circus elephant but couldn't afford its upkeep. He decided to raise money by organising a contest - 10 dollars per entry, with a first prize of 30,000 dollars to anybody who could ....

Views : 535    Rating : 2.5    Read More...

Dogs lie around all day sprawled on the most comfortable piece of furniture in the house. They can hear a package of food opening half a block away, but don't hear you when you're in the same room....

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Two neighbours had been fighting furiously with each other for as long as they could remember. One day Oliver bought a Great Dane and taught it to do its business in Alan's back yard. For the next six....

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One day Oliver went to the zoo. Whilst standing in front of the gorilla enclosure, a gust of wind blew some grit in his eye. As he pulled his eyelid down to dislodge the annoying particle, the Gorilla....

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Mrs. Agathe's dishwasher quit working so she called a repairman. Since she had to go to work the next day, she told him, "I'll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the co....

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Two men went hunting. One had been hunting all his life, the other man was hunting for the first time. The one man told the other to sit down and not make a sound. So he did. But when the first man go....

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This guy wakes up one morning to find a gorilla in his tree. He looks in the phone book for a gorilla removal service until he finds one. "Is it a boy or girl Gorilla?" the service guy asks. "Boy,....

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An big Elephant is drinking out of a river when he spots a turtle asleep on a log. The elephant ambles over and kicks the unsuspecting turtle clear across the river. "Why did you do that?" asks a ....

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A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter. "What are you doing?" She asked. "Hunting Flies" He responded. "Oh!, Killed any?" She asked. "Yep,....

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A single man wanted someone to help him with the household chores, so he decided to get a pet to help out. He went to the local pet shop and asks the owner for advice on a suitable animal. The owner s....

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Two alligators are sitting on the edge of a swamp. The small one turns to the big one and says; I don't understand how you can be so much bigger than me. We're the same age, we were the same size as k....

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